Hard Fall

I did not have a good weekend. It started with receiving our paychecks and learning that hubby's was really, really short. That just set me off on the wrong foot. From there, the baby kept me up most of Friday night and when he finally did go to sleep I couldn't because I was still freaking about money.

Saturday morning, got into a short fight with hubby. Tried to call back to apologize to make amends and he pretty much told me to take a long walk off a short plank. I tried called him again that night and he told me to read his email before hanging up on me. So, I read his email and he says he doesn't want to hear from me until I've sought medical treatment for my depression. Then he added not to try calling him or talking to him cuz he's trying to work. So, I haven't called him or tried to talk to him since Saturday night.

Needless to say, yesterday I pretty much hurled myself off the wagon. I ate when I didn't want to eat. I ate comfort food like mac & cheese and ice cream. I ate until I felt slightly ill and then I ate some more.

I didn't exercise. I didn't try to go for a walk or take the kids to the park or anything productive except some minor house cleaning. I read for most of the day. Then I took a few Simply Sleep and went to bed early.

This morning I feel like crap. I always feel tired and groggy after taking sleeping pills. I have no motivation to do anything productive. I know I gained from yesterday. I can't be bothered to get back into the game.

Simply said, I can't be bothered, with anything.